• TheaoneAndOnly27@kbin.social
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      10 months ago

      In December 2022 I realized I skipped seeing my cardiologist for 6 years. Did a 24 hour monitor. Apparently my heart rate was dropping to 21 bpm and stopping pumping for up to three seconds. So in February 2023 they cut me open and give me a pacemaker. Months go on and I am still getting winded. So they did another heart Cath procedure (on the 28th) and it turns out my heart is doing worse than thought even, so in the next 3-5 years I’ll need a heart transplant. But the make up of my organ layout means I’ll need a specialist, which just all sounds so slim. I am 33 and so fucking tired.

      I hope to leave some of this stress behind. I know there’s a lot I can’t escape now, but I hope I can leave some of the anger and fear behind. It’s been hard to be a good dad or partner this year just from feeling so stressed, and if I don’t know how long we will have I just want my daughter to remember a happier dad.

      • fine_sandy_bottom@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        10 months ago

        God I feel you so hard my guy.

        I’m only a few years older than you and have ischaemic cv disease (blocked arteries). It’s a common problem in people twice my age. I thought I ate well and exercised regularly but it turns out that stuff doesn’t help that much if you lost the genetic lottery like me.

        I had a heart attack this year, while my partner was pregnant with our first children. Yes 2x kids. They were born a few months ago.

        IDK if I have 2 years or 20 years to do my best for them… but fuck it’s a bitter pill.

        I absolutely get the dread / fear / anger.

        Every time I have a new blood test that shows I’m more fucked than I hoped it just… hurts.