Can’t catch a break

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  • 26 Comments
Joined 10 months ago
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Cake day: October 12th, 2023

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  • I’m a lesbian and my partner is also partially disabled. She manages her conditions but as far as we know, it’s as good as it will get. (I have chronic issues too but I am typically mobile.)

    We like to game together. We watch movies together. She also games with her friends and I go out and do other more physically demanding activities with my own friends. We like to discover new food and talk about politics.

    We found that our sense of humor and morality aligns well and we enjoy each other’s company. That and the fact that she was independent drew me to her.

    Good luck out there.


  • The sound is bad enough but with properly constructed walls, it’s not a problem.

    I have other problems with shared walls. Your neighbors have cockroaches? Now you do too! Bedbugs? Yep those can come on in too. If you live in an apartment, then you bet the landlord will cheap out and not do as effective treatments. You think being clean and not keeping things in cardboard will stop them? Maybe temporarily but they’re just waiting to come back out from the walls where they weren’t treated. Joy!

    The other thing is that if your neighbor smokes cigarettes inside, then you get some bonus secondhand smoke. If you have bad reactions even with allergy medications and HEPA filters, well I guess it’s time for you to move or suffer. (You didn’t want to use your PTO on anything not sick days right?)

    Did your neighbors have a plumbing problem that they neglected? Congratulations on your new mold in your shared walls. (You wanted to call code enforcement on your landlord about this? Good luck, they won’t enforce it.)

    I’m sure there are real solutions to my above problems but my reality is that the only solution is to move when it’s too much to bear. (Haven’t lived in one place for more than 2 years because of it…)


  • Getting a BS in Computer Science was huge towards my success. I had to work while in college due to lack of funds. My job as a programmer paid very little before I got my degree. Even with years of experience, I had a hard time getting a dev job with an employer that paid better without my degree. With the degree, it was significantly easier.

    I’ve heard of stories of folks that “made it” in dev without a degree. I did not have the charisma or whatever other skill they had to do it…

    I will say I have quite a few student loans because my scholarships weren’t enough (I was an average student at best) and my family made a lot of money but didn’t help me so I didn’t get other aid I would have normally qualified for. For me, my very well paying job outweighs the student loan payment. My gamble paid off. (It was a fairly safe gamble, but one can never really know in the uncertainty of life.)

    However, even in the last few years school has gone up in price A LOT so that may change the calculations for future folks.









  • No. I like having the historical data and being able to see trends in my net worth and spending over years. YNAB lets you hide closed accounts and unused categories, so I don’t feel like my budget is cluttered with stuff I don’t care about.

    In the past, I used a fresh start when I was first starting out with YNAB. My first few budgets were experiments and served the purpose of letting me figure out how the software worked. When I finally got a good handle on how it worked, I did a fresh start and set up everything the way I liked it.