Don’t worry. Unless your penis is prehensile, I doubt you’ll get the proper angle and pressure to accomplish this assist.

That said, a good bidet is far more effective. 💩

“The only “people” moving to Texas are tax mules and corpo scumbags”

Or in my brother’s case, following an ex wife who decided to marry someone from Texas and move there with the kids. Sometimes moving is cheaper and less complicated than legal battles with a parent you still have to work with for another 10 years.

The clock is ticking though. As soon as the youngest graduates high school they’re getting the hell out of there.

This is actually closest to the best thing lol.

Our bodies are meant to move, not sit statically even with “perfect” posture. By fidgeting, slouching, sitting tall, leaning, and all kinds of variations we’re responding to feedback from our bodies. Keep listening and keep moving!

But they heard the word once and it sounds sciency, so they keep repeating it.

I’d think it would depend on the frequency of interactions. Leg and foot protection would add weight, so unless the dwarves were expected they might not want to bear the extra burden.

On that note, Lord of the Rings extended editions have been showing in theaters the last couple weekends. I kept thinking how prior to battles the fighters were all geared up and marched for days (or longer) and showed up throwing themselves straight into battle. Here I am not functioning as my soft ass finishes my coffee in bed, trying to negotiate when I need to actually start getting ready for work.

I love using Hawaiian rolls/buns/bread for like, anything really lol.

Ham, pineapple, onions, green peppers, and jalapenos, no sauce. One of my favorite pizzas.

There’s enough goodness that you really don’t need pizza sauce on it, or at least I’ve never come across a sauce that works with pineapple. But the flavors and textures work well together.

Since birth our brains are wired to look for faces. It helps with survival when the helpless wiggly thing bonds with the giant who is full of hormones telling them to protect it.

As we grow we learn to recognize other patterns, which help us find food, be safe, find a mate, etc. Our brains are constantly looking to match everything we see with something from a previous experience. Which is unfortunately one of the places PTSD can pop up. Say you had a traumatic experience - you may not remember seeing someone wearing a red hat just prior to something terrible happening, but your brain might. In the aftermath it’s possible that you find yourself uncomfortable around someone wearing a red hat but can’t figure out why. You may not remember, but your brain does and thinks it’s helping by alerting you too a problem.

This is my retirement plan. When the time comes, I’ll hide in the vast caves and eat cheese the rest of my existence.

As close as you can get to “eat soon”. It’ll have a decent air pocket developed and the membrane adhering to the shell will be weaker.

It depends? I know some people who have low tolerance to anything scary/horror or even intensely suspenseful and would lose sleep over some of the things I go to sleep listening to. I don’t truly scare easily, but there are some stories that under the right circumstances will creep me out enough to want some eye bleach before going to bed in the house alone. My favorite is when I have my earbuds set to noise cancelling and I really get into a story and think that someone else in the house is gone or sleeping, then I see them and scare the shit out of myself lol.

Yep - if it’s an expense I have to pay monthly anyway and might as well use one card for my expenses then pay it off every month and reap the rewards points/cash back.

You know how many smokers have/had their hard line on what price would make them quit smoking? For me (a 52yo woman) that was when pop breached $5.99 a 24 pack case. I would buy it again occasionally if sale prices dipped into that range, but having crossed that line it broke my habit. The thought of $7 for a 12 pack is just painful.

Something I haven’t seen other commenters bring up that can have a huge impact, is the overall lifestyles people are living.

The unhealthiest years of my life were when I was working 2 jobs and struggling to keep a roof over mine and my 3 kids heads. Stress and depression were huge problems and money was tight, so sometimes the little bit of dopamine or serotonin from eating a “treat” were the highlights of the day. Add to that, the guilt of not being around to cook regular meals for my kids lead to 1) making large amounts of food on my one day off that could be eaten as leftovers throughout the week or 2) easy convenience foods (frozen pizzas, boxed Mac and cheese, etc) that the kids could make when I wasn’t around.

Fast forward many years - my kids are adults taking care of themselves and I’m down to 1 good job that offers financial stability. My diet and health have completely changed. I actually have the time and energy to cook and plan better.

I’m not saying this to shift blame or responsibility, but to bring a different experience. When I hear (hopefully well meaning) people suggest “just cook healthier meals” it strikes me about the same as “stop eating avocado toast and you could afford a house.”

One of my favorite movies growing up! I showed it to my kids when they were about the same age and scared the shit out of them lol.

Oh, in America you still have to provide those things too, AND have a decent credit score.

There’s always the “aw fuck it, roll it in cocoa powder” approach lol.

Yep - Garmin Venu 3 here. I just charged and it’s telling me 15 days of battery, but with my use I’ll probably charge it in 12-13 days.

I mean, it’s hospice lol. I work with some of the most compassionate, respectful, and caring people I could ever hope to work with. We also tend to have a macabre sense of humor. 🥴

The hospital provides phones and has us use Teams for remote meetings and other communication. Official patient information is always recorded through Epic/Haiku. Since the majority of the staff is in the field, they’ll use Teams to communicate throughout the day for staffing updates and to notify us of deaths - particularly helpful if you’re me driving to the patients house and planning on giving them a massage lol.