I’m gay. I’m agender, and I like enbies better than men and women.
The other day in an argument I got frustrated with someone and told them to call me a homophobic slur. One part sarcasm, one part hoping they’d actually do it and get in trouble. Instead, I got punished for using the word. I wasn’t expecting that, because I’m gay. If I call myself a f-----, I didn’t think that was anyone else’s problem.
Was I right? Is it okay for me to use that word, talking about myself?
My take on the whole thing, is if you’re cool being called these words by anyone (gay or otherwise) in a similar fashion, then go for it. Otherwise, don’t. You show people how you want to be treated (though not everyone learns). Double standards like this, though, are not conducive of an accepting society, and they support continuous hatred, so, personally, I won’t do it.
To your story, I’m not sure who got you on trouble, but it might have been seen more as you maliciously goating them? Honestly, I don’t know, but it sounds plausible (stupid, yes, but plausible).